Sunday, October 27, 2013

Why in the world did I create this blog? Let me tell you.

So today I thought I would tell you all why I decided to start this blog, because some people may have the wrong idea or just think I like to vent on my blog. I admit, there have been a couple times but those couple times do not define my true intent. So when my dad was called to be a mission president I was both shocked, scared and excited. I thought about it everyday until the day we got on that airplane, but, one of the ideas I had early on was to create a blog. I started thinking about why I should write a blog and who it would benefit and I then started thinking about the song 'Lean on Me'. We were called my brother's senior year and to those of you who know me really well you will know me and my brother are really best friends, we would do tons of things together all the time ranging from video games to brother sister date nights, he was the person I "Leaned on" the most. Since coming here I haven't had him anywhere near and at first I was really sad and depressed. My brother was the person I told ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to, he was my role model, my friend, my confidant and still is, but now when I yell his name in the house he isn't gonna show up around the corner or holler back, because obviously, he is not here. My brother is doing amazing work on his own mission, teaching people and sharing god's light and love, and I would want nothing less but since he's not going to be at my beckon call I thought I might be at other's, so to speak. So that Is why I created this blog. To be a big sister, or friend to those who need one. Someone who understands, another mission president's child passing along the stories so that other kids out there will know they're not alone. I post the things I do, not to gossip, not for my own selfish wishes but for the benefit of others and for the reason that I can better understand my situations and help others, by writing. While I cannot do big things to change the world, I can do small things that make a big difference, this blog just so happens to be one of those small things. I try to contribute to the world in anyways that I can, not too much is available to me to do right now but I can start with myself, I can start in my community and neighborhood, and this blog reaches many places, so, this is how I am contributing to the world. I have found through many experiences that service and helping others and being of help not only helps others but it helps ourselves too. A couple of years ago I had started going to a service camp in Utah called BBY (Be the Best You) hosted by Barbara Barrington Jones (such an amazing woman). At these camps each summer we would hold a special needs camps for special needs woman, visit old folks homes, take children from the boys and girls club to the petting zoo and museum and many other things. PEOPLE, THAT WEEK I SPENT THOSE SUMMERS WERE THE BEST WEEKS OF MY LIFE!!! Just seeing an elderly lady light up when she talked about a memory from her childhood or the way the special needs girls got so happy when they saw balloons or the kids when they saw the animals, those things sparked up joy inside of me, and by the time I left each time I felt I was on fire!! I have been looking for orphanages here in Guayaquil that I can go volunteer at or other opportunities but for now, this blog is fanning my service flame. This blog his how I am contributing and will continue to do so. Maybe this service is not changing the world and traveling around the world like UNICEFF or other organizations but it is traveling around the hearts of those in this world, and I can honestly say that not many things feel as good as knowing there is someone who understands, knowing you are not alone in what you are going through, someone who can be that shoulder to lean on, a friend. So I say to you, my reader, that not only am I your friend, but so is our Savior Jesus Christ, and he understands more than I or anyone will ever know. That is what the atonement is for, he died on the cross not only for our sins but for our struggles and heartaches. Just remember these things, and you will never be alone. 

Friday, October 18, 2013

Lessons Learned

Hellloooo my family and friends!! I am so sorry I was going to write on my birthday but i totally forgot so here is my birthday post 14 days after my birthday haha So this month has been very good for the most part I still have great friends and more have come and I have learned a few things. So I have never been the most consistent reader for the scriptures i'll do it morning and night for a while and then i'll stop and only do it sometimes. Well, this week and last week i did it!! Consistently! Not only did I feel my day was more productive but I noticed something! For the first couple days that a did it my days were horrible!! Like Satan was trying to get me to stop reading out of anger and frustration.. I was receiving so much opposition and hard things and so depressed and I was wondering to myself "If i am doing the write thing.. why is all this bad stuff happening?" Well after the few days my situations didn't improve all that much, Satan was still going at it trying to make me mad buuut I was stronger, I started being more positive and looking for the good and making a good day even if it wasn't, if I didn't like my situation I made it good I did things to make myself like it..  AND IT WORKED!! Now some of you might be thinking well thats just coincidence, you're just a positive person.. BUT NO. I have not been a positive person all the time I usually just get discouraged and call it a bad day, no questions asked I can go cry in my room for hours and ask heavenly father why he is doing this to me. I have a testimony that reading the scriptures and praying and reading conference talks really does help and improve your day and yourself. Not only did I make myself happy I was given the strength to do it, the want to do it. Sometimes I just like to wallow in self pity and feel bad for myself but not this time!! With the help of heavenly father I could lift myself up out of that darkness. That is one of the greatest things I have ever known, and such a great gift. I have power over my own day, my own life. YOU have power over your own day, your own life. I am so grateful for all my hard trials. They make me stronger. Okay, here is the other thing. The other day I was having really bad growth pains in my legs, which usually that means you are growing, so I got so happy because I was like "YES!!! I AM GETTING TALLER!! WOOT WOOT!!" haha I was so happy and then I realized life is much the same, you have to go through pain to grow, to know, to feel all the things you wouldn't otherwise. I realized even more than I have before , that through all this, even though it is just the beginning (It feels like we have been here a year haha) I have been growing and I have been getting better. So yay!!! That to me is cool. Muy chevere. Nuestro padre celestial saven que el esta haciendo. Si se puethe!! So another cool thing... ME ESPANOL ESTA MEJORANDO MUCHO!!! My spanish is getting alot better!!! I can understand everything and I can speak pretty good and get my thoughts across!! pretty cool huh?! Another thing I realized... the missionaries wear name tags that have three names on them: elder/sister - theirs, The church - god's and Jesus Christ and their last name which is their family's name. Whatever they do is a reflection on all three and people are going to notice. PEOPLE!! MISSIONARIES ARE NOT THE ONLY ONES WHO WEAR THESE THREE NAMES!!! WE DO TOO!!! I realized this and immediately thought about all the things i was doing that i should't be or would reflect bad on those three names. I have had to be very careful because as a wearer of these three names I (we) stand as a witness, an example and a representative for them. Keeping this in mind I noticed I was more able to be a better person and keep my standards, because not only am i standing for myself I am standing for many and knowing this has helped me to stand. I feel like the lord has been carrying me through so many things and I am so grateful to him. Whoever you are, whatever you are doing, wherever you  are, DO NOT GIVE UP!! If you need to change some things about yourself to make yourself better, DO IT. But please, never give up. I wouldn't be the bettered person I am today if I had just given up. Love you all!!